A Realistic Guide to Living in Alignment with Your Values

I was browsing through Reddit a week or so ago (as one does) and I stumbled upon this slightly older post that asks: Did Jung really say “The privilege of a lifetime is being who you truly are?”

I had never heard that quote before, and a quick scroll through the comments answered the question rather promptly and attributed that quote to Joseph Campbell and not Jung. Now, admittedly, until that moment, I’d never really heard of Joseph Campbell. But in the larger scheme of things, that didn’t really matter.

What made me pause wasn’t the mystery behind the author of the quote, but the quote itself:

“The privilege of a lifetime is being who you truly are.”

It stuck with me, not because it sounded deep, but because it felt undeniably true.

Being who you truly are and having the privilege to live it isn’t a given. You not only have to figure out who you are, but you have to keep choosing to show up as that version of you. And many people don’t even get a chance to indulge in this self-awareness and design their lives on their terms.

That choice to keep showing up as your real, aligned self doesn’t happen by accident. It’s shaped by what you believe, what you say yes to, what you walk away from, where you focus your energy, and how you spend your ordinary days.

And whether you’re living in alignment with your values or not boils down to a sum total of all of the things that you do and all of the things that you don’t do. The closer your day-to-day actions are to your values, your life vision, the closer you’ll feel to living in alignment.

How to Live a Life in Alignment With Your Values

So how do you actually build a life that reflects who you really are?

It begins with clarity, then intention, followed by action. And ultimately, the willingness to keep showing up for it all, even when it gets hard or inconvenient, and making adjustments as needed along the way.

Here’s a little guide to help you articulate your vision and your values, and then apply that as a base to create a life that is true to you.

1. Clarify your life vision

Start by asking yourself what kind of life you actually want to create. Go beyond the obvious (job title, net worth, or a list of achievements), and think in terms of what kind of person you want to be, and what kind of life you want to look back on one day.

What would you regret not doing, not feeling, not becoming? If you were to zoom out 10 or 20 or 30 years, what kind of relationships, work, and experiences would feel meaningful to you?

You don’t necessarily have to create a rigid 10-year plan, and it doesn’t even need to be a perfect blueprint. Even a rough outline of what your deepest desire life vision looks like to you is enough to start making more intentional choices in the present.

2. Define your core values

Yes, this again. I know I sound like a broken record at this point, but it really does begin here.

Your values are your inner compass. They’re the qualities and principles that matter most to you – the things you want your life to reflect. Whether it’s freedom, compassion, growth, creativity, or something else entirely, getting clear on your core values gives you something to measure your decisions against.

(Need help identifying them? Here’s a core values list to get you started.)

3. Articulate your current priorities

I like to think of values as guiding principles for how you choose to show up in life, and priorities as the things that you will show up for in the current season of your life.

Let’s say honesty is one of your core values. What that means is that you will be honest in your behaviour, in your words, and in your way of living. And maybe in this current season of your life, one of your priorities is “building your business”. In terms of your values, that means you will run your business with honesty, and when it comes to prioritization, you will choose actions and efforts that will further your goal of building your business.

Knowing your current priorities gives your time and energy a filter. It helps you say “no” more confidently and “yes” more meaningfully.

4. Keep your values and priorities visible

Once you’ve clarified your values and priorities, keep them where you can actually see them.

That could mean writing them on a sticky note and placing it on your mirror, keeping them on the front page of your journal, or turning them into a small reminder that sits by your desk or bedside table. The more often you see them, the more likely you are to live by them.

Alignment isn’t just about big decisions. It’s built in the small, ordinary choices you make every day. Let these visible reminders be your guide in the day-to-day.

5. Take aligned action

This is the part where a lot of people tend to get stuck. They think once they’ve “done the inner work,” that their outer life will automatically sort itself out (something like expecting vision boards to work simply because you’ve stuck pictures on a board!).

But intention without action is just wishful thinking.

You need to actually live your values. That could mean having a hard conversation you’ve been putting off. Or, committing to a fitness habit for real. Or it could simply mean starting your day with intention – instead of reaching for your phone first thing in the morning, you stretch, pour yourself a cup of tea, and begin with something that matters to you.

Small aligned actions, repeated consistently, are what move the needle when it comes to building a life worth living.

6. Build meaningful boundaries

You don’t have to live in reaction to everything that comes your way. In fact, you shouldn’t.

If you know what derails you, say, a never-ending social media scroll, or late-night work emails, build soft guardrails that protect your energy and priorities. Maybe it’s a 20-minute social media app time limit. Maybe it’s turning off all notifications post 8 p.m.

If spending time with family in the evenings is a priority, maybe your work-life boundary looks like not scheduling meetings after 5 p.m.

Again, think about your life vision, your values, your priorities, and be mindful of habits that might be big energy drainers. Creating boundaries isn’t about cutting yourself off from life, but instead, being intentional about what gets to shape your life in the first place.

7. Make space for joy

An aligned life isn’t just about goals and grit and constant optimization. If you’re not carving out space for joy, you’re missing the point. Joy isn’t optional. It’s a vital sign of alignment.

Can you imagine creating the most optimized life but having no room for joy and pleasure? What’s the point of such a life! You’re not a robot, after all.

8. Practice gratitude

Yes, it’s everywhere. Yes, it can sound like a cliché. But gratitude changes how you see the life you’re living.

It helps you stay rooted in what’s already working and appreciate your many blessings. And when practiced regularly, it creates space for contentment and presence, even when life feels uncertain.

And while you can surely maintain a formal gratitude journal, you definitely don’t need to. It can be as simple as naming three things you’re grateful for when you wake up or even right before you go to sleep.

I am sharing this here in case it helps anyone reading this – my personal mantra when it comes to gratitude is “I am thankful for all that I have, and all that I don’t”. I am not a religious person, but I do believe in god (in many shapes and forms). And I genuinely believe that some of the things in my life that have been removed or that haven’t materialized yet are because either they weren’t truly meant for me, or that there is a lesson I still need to learn.

9. Create systems of accountability

Whether it’s through a habit tracker or a check-in buddy, having some form of a reflection system keeps you honest with yourself.

You might commit to checking in with a friend once a week. Or keeping a simple tracker that shows how often you’re showing up for the habits that matter to you. Over time, patterns will become visible and you’ll be able to see what’s supporting your alignment and what’s quietly eroding it. Use that information to further tweak your practices and/or expectations.

10. Stay open to change and growth

Just because something worked for you two years ago doesn’t mean it still fits today.

Your circumstances will shift. Your needs will evolve. And so will your values and priorities. Staying in alignment doesn’t mean clinging to one version of your life. It means being willing to revisit, rethink, and realign when needed.

11. Reflect and adjust as needed

Somewhat an extension of the earlier point, but you have to remember that alignment isn’t a one-time decision. It’s an ongoing conversation between your life and your values.

Build in time to pause and check in. What’s feeling good right now? What’s starting to feel off? What are you avoiding and why?

It doesn’t have to be elaborate. Maybe a short nighttime check-in or a weekly journal session. Or you could go kinda corporate-ish and schedule a “My Personal Life Board Meeting” day every quarter. And if you’re in a serious relationship or married, you could even call it a “State of the Union” meeting. :)

What matters is that you stay connected to your own direction. Your life can only stay aligned if you’re paying attention to what it’s becoming.

If there’s one thing I hope this list leaves you with, it’s this – alignment isn’t a switch you flip. It’s something you keep building over time, through conscious choices.

Sometimes that means saying no to things that look good on paper but feel off in your gut. Other times, it means noticing the small moments where you’re living exactly as you want to, and letting that be enough.

There’s no perfect map here. But when you have a clear vision, honest values, and the willingness to keep checking in and adjusting, you give yourself a solid foundation to create a life well lived.

How about you – do you feel aligned in life right now? And are there any specific alignment practices you follow? I’d love to hear from you in the comments below!